5 Modern Lessons from an Old-School Secretary

“Where is he? Is he here?” The Senior VP of Sales and Marketing stood with his hands on his hips and directed his question to the empty reception area. I looked from the receptionist to the Senior VP, and back again. The receptionist ducked her head. Apparently she thought I, the summer-temp, should be the one to speak up.

“He came in and asked Joanne to get him coffee and now he’s in the conference room, waiting for you.”

“He what?”

“He’s in the conference room—”

“No, did you say he asked Joanne to get him coffee?”

“Yes, he did, he—” I stopped, as the Senior VP frowned. He turned his solid six-foot frame and marched towards the conference room.

“No one asks Joanne for coffee,” he muttered, loud enough for us to hear. “She gets coffee for no one.”

I tiptoed along behind him and caught sight of the hapless businessman and his little white cup of coffee as he stood up from the conference table. The Senior VP shut the door behind him with a loud ka-thunk. I wished I could press my ear to the door. It was 1997, after all. Secretaries didn’t fetch coffee anymore. Plus, after years of working together, the Senior VP admired Joanne and knew she deserved respect.

Moments before, the visiting businessman – middle-aged and dressed in a crisp dark suit – announced his arrival to the receptionist, breezed past the reception desk, and headed for the conference room. Joanne intercepted him and introduced herself as the Senior VP’s executive assistant, to which the businessman replied, “Could you get me some coffee? Black, with two sugars?”

If there was any doubt in my 19-year-old mind prior to this moment, it evaporated when I witnessed his attitude – I was not going to grow up to be an administrative or executive assistant, or any other spiffed-up title for a secretary. Were people ever going to wake up and see the position as especially deserving of respect? No, the businessman’s pervasive attitude was likely to remain, due to factors that weren’t going to change. Namely, in the corporate world, those who generated revenue would always be seen as more important than those who didn’t. Also, an assistant’s role often included caretaking and custodial tasks, which most people considered menial. Lastly, in addition to all of the above, most secretarial positions were held by women – the norm in the culture of corporate America. If you’re wondering about the current percentage of women in a secretarial role, it’s 94.6%, according to the Boston Globe and the U.S. Department of Labor.

Just the other day, I received a one-line email from a co-worker who sat in a meeting in our main conference room with an important partner company. Will you come in and ask if anyone wants some coffee? This co-worker was not a businessman with a previous era’s mindset. She was my age and, in one sentence, confirmed my suspicion that the perception of my position, as an office manager, was synonymous with that of a secretary and hadn’t changed in the 22 years since my days as a summer-temp.

I stood up from my desk, swallowed my pride, and walked into the conference room. Fourteen pairs of eyes shifted to my face. I asked if anyone would like some coffee. A meeting participant on the conference speaker-phone set in the center of the table said he would like some coffee, and the room laughed.

I worked as a temp for Joanne’s company before and after my freshman year in college. I was full of big undefined dreams, and dismissed the practical skills Joanne taught me as irrelevant to my intended future as anything but a secretary. Today I benefit from focused intentions and a broader perspective. I aim to embrace all that my “secretarial” position offers, the good as well as the challenging, and I recognize the significance of the intuitive, if not the practical, lessons I learned from Joanne:

1. Perform your skills with panache, and feel free to share them.

Joanne typed faster than anyone in the office, and especially faster than the Senior VP, who used the hunt-and-peck method. Thanks to Joanne’s long manicured fingernails, when she sat at her electric-typewriter and typed it sounded like a performance by a tap dancing legend – from anywhere in the office. Are you a whiz at Excel? Have you mastered an app that makes expense reports a breeze? What is something you know how to do well at work that can benefit your co-workers? Let your skills shine. Offer to tutor anyone who’s interested, or offer a brief lunchtime course for your co-workers.

2. Adapt your personal style to your work, not the other way around.

I saw a lot of denim and flannel in my office the other day. I like the idea of casual, comfortable office attire, and yet… Joanne dressed in soft, loose (but not baggy), blouses, blazers, and slacks, in colorful but muted earthy tones. There were no “casual Fridays” for Joanne. She almost always wore low heels. Her thick hair was short and neatly-styled. Joanne took her personal style and turned it up a professional notch, and the result was a unique look that communicated the comfort and confidence she felt about herself, and her work.

3. Take the high road and avoid the eye-roll.

One or two younger and hipper admins in Joanne’s office regarded Joanne as old-fashioned. The other admins never told me they considered Joanne behind-the-times, but the insincere way they interacted with her told me all I needed to know. True, they had more modern skills than Joanne, but their gossipy attitudes made them appear less professional, and less wise. Joanne never said anything negative, or rolled her eyes, about anyone. As a result, Joanne gained great respect from the Senior VP, and any other co-worker, like me, who noticed her poise.

4. Be timeless in your perspective, but know when to upgrade.

The other admins were right in their assessment that Joanne wasn’t interested in learning new technologies relevant to her job. I think she considered computers a passing trend. She was right, in a way. Technology is impermanent, in that it continues to evolve. I relate to Joanne’s underlying reluctance – I prefer using systems I’m familiar with rather than trying something new. However, thanks to Joanne’s example, I recognize the only thing that will remain the same is change, and while fossils are impressive, I’d rather evolve than become one.

5. Mind your default expression, and attitude.

Joanne’s default expression was a small bemused smile. If she was troubled by something, she didn’t show it, and I don’t think she suppressed her feelings. She didn’t let much bother her, not even when an out-of-touch businessman asked her to fetch him some coffee. When I asked her what she thought about the incident, shortly after it happened, her eyes twinkled and she widened her smile. She waved the incident away as if shooing away a fly.

I suspect Joanne accomplished her poise by reminding herself that life was too short to let anything other than her own healthy sense of self-worth define her. To Joanne, an individual’s rudeness was yet another passing trend. She didn’t let it define her, but what’s more, she didn’t let it define the individual. That is what I admire most about Joanne – the grace she extended to herself and everyone else.